Classic TV Blog Association celebrates with A Very Merry MeTV Blogathon 2015!

CLASSIC TV BLOG ASSOCIATION: Presents! – A VERY MERRY MeTV BLOGATHON!

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The Andy Griffith Show

Season One episode 11– Aired on December 19, 1960

Santa Fife

THE CHRISTMAS STORY:

A VERY DICKENSEAN MAYBERRY CHRISTMAS!

On the eve of Christmas when Andy and Barney are planning on celebrating Christmas with Aunt Bea, Opie and Ellie, Andy is setting his mind to allowing both cells full of prisoners who were disturbing the peace (the basic holiday drunkeness) to go home for Christmas!

Andy’s sweeping up and apologizing to the prisoners about there being the only kind of pillows they got for the cells. Often Andy’s jail seems as homey and welcoming as most towns people’s homes. What with Aunt Bea’s hand made Doilies and bringing supper consisting of chicken and dumplings, sweet potato pie, johnny cakes, (no worries –not those bad ole home pickles– them kerosene cucumbers! They’re scattered all the way from Seattle to Nova Scotia) At the jailhouse there’s always breakfast, lunch and dinner, and it’s always a feast for either wayward prisoner, or Otis sleeping off a snoot full….

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Greeting from State Prison

Barney comes in in a particularly jovial mood with a package of Christmas cards. More people seem to remember them this year than any other!

And boy Andy does love to get and open up Christmas cards more than anything he knows of.

Barney opens up a card from the Hubacher Brothers.

Just a note: We rescued 3 little feral tabby kittens last year. Of course we named them the Eubacher brothers. Sadly we lost Mikey to a horrible virus a few months later, but Archie and Sidney are doing well! And whenever the show mentions those Hubacher brothers, it tickles us thoroughly.

Barney tells Andy “They always send such nice family pictures.”

Andy asks where they are right now. Barney matter of factly answers,  “Up in State Prison.”
Andy enjoyed the picture they sent last year more. It was more “outdoorsy and Christmasy feeling” Barney tells him, “They was all working out on the County Road then.”

“Merry Christmas from State Prison” Barney smiles “I think it’s just wonderful that they’re all together on Christmas.” Then Andy finds one for Barney marked personal. You know he’s about to poke fun at him royally about either Hilda May or later on in the show it will be… the unseen Jaunita over at The Blue Bird Diner.

Barney reads the card and giggles to himself. “That’s sweet.” When he realizes that Andy is watching him he quickly shoves it in his pocket, looking like a boy caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

Andy answers the phone all toothy and grinning. Aunt Bea is on the phone. “Oh Hey Aunt Bea Yeah, I got the doodads for the tree…” He tells her he doesn’t want to be Santa Claus again this year. “I was last year….”

Andy is so excited about the Christmas Party, and he tells Barney that he’s gonna be Santa Claus this time, but Barney says no… because he isn’t gonna be there since he’s going to be on duty minding the prisoners in the cells.

Andy says “Oh yeah, well that does make a problem then don’t it” Barney tells him… “You know with a little practice I could have done a very mean Ho Ho Ho Merry Christmas!”

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Andy is figuring on what he has them boys in the cells for anyways. Barney thinks he means what law infractions. Like disturbing the peace. But that’s not what Andy is driving at. “We got em in there to kind a teach them a lesson, ain’t that right?” Barney reluctantly goes along at first. In one of Andy’s crafty rationals he figures that it makes the prisoners sort of like students, making he and Barney teachers and the jail house sort of like school! So when it’s a holiday what else can you do…?

Only one thing to do, right! Let all them students go home for Christmas!

Barney tries out a hearty Ho Ho Ho!

Acting in this Christmas play is the modern day Ebenezer Scrooge, the crotchety department store owner Ben Weaver (Will Wright) who’s ill-tempered swagger injects his mean spirited humbuggery into the gaiety around the prison.

Weaver barges into the jail like a grizzled old bounty hunter with Sam Muggins (Sam Edwards) gripped in one hand and a jug of hard cider in the other.

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Weaver, the miserly, curmudgeon wants Sheriff Taylor to arrest Sam for moon-shining and lock him up in a cell on Christmas Eve! That man has got all the meanness in town…

Weaver’s caught Sam red handed and shows him the jug as evidence. Andy takes a sniff and his eyes roll back in his head. “Well I’ll have to admit… it ain’t exactly Sarsaparilla.”

Andy pleads his case to Weaver… Sam Muggins really only just made “a batch, to merry up Christmas… Ben”“Now you heard me Sheriff lock him up!” urging Andy to do his duty. Andy tries to convince Ben Weaver that Sam didn’t make the spirits to try to sell and after all, tomorrow being Christmas, and Sam being a family man Christmas being a family holiday.

Andy- “If that ain’t the meanest, orneriest, low-downiest man” Andy apologizes and puts Sam in the cell. Poor Sam feels so bad about spending Christmas in a cell without his family and his youngins having to spend Christmas without their Pappy.

Andy tries to reason with the miserly Weaver, “I was just wondering if…” Ben snaps at Andy- No sir! I’d like to see how forgiving you’d be, if you had a store that sold spirits and half the county was cutting in on your sale by making their own. Agin the law!”

Ben tells him he’s gonna keep an eye on him. Andy gives his word that right after Christmas he’ll arrest him and try him strictly according to the law. “And if this here moon-shiner ain’t in that cell every minute of the time, I’m gonna report you to the state officials for being derelict in your duty. and you know I’ve got enough pull up there to make it stick.”

Barney has the notion and asks Andy if they can’t just dismiss school again… He’s worried that Ben could actually make a whole lotta trouble. Barney was sure looking forward to playing Santa Claus he starts to sing Jingle Bells to himself. Andy gets that grin on his face like he’s got another one of those shrewd ideas! “No by dog there’s more than one way to pluck a buzzard. Yes Sir!!!!”

Ben sees Andy bringing the whole Muggins family in the police car. Jingle Bells is playing as he escorts the family out of the car and into the jailhouse.

In Andy’s witty, wise and resourceful manner he often figures out ways around the befuddlements of human nature, and so to appease mean old Weaver he arrests Sam’s entire family, wife Bess (Joy Ellison) and even toothless little Effie (Margaret Kerry) and little Billy.

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Andy sees this as a way the Muggins family can celebrate their Christmas all together. So with his home spun cunning and wit, charges Effie and the children as “accessories before, during, and after the fact.”

Andy engages Eleanor and Aunt Bea to help watch over the prisoners Muggins. And of course they need to eat, so the party festivities are re-directed to the jailhouse. The feast and all the fixings are brought there. Even the beautifully festooned Christmas Tree is now at the jail ready to be decorated with tinsel, fringe and ball lights. The festivities continue, lots of roast turkey and egg nog, Andy on the guitar and caroling and the warmth of friendship and kindness abounds.

Weaver’s face appears as if soaked in vinegar as he watches from outside the jailhouse window, a sad lonely man. The old coot becomes embittered while everyone else is full of the joy of Christmas. Weaver does everything he can to get himself arrested. Secretly wanting to be a part of the celebration but soaked in too much pride and cantankerousness to admit he’s lonely.

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Yes Andy’s jail is good enough to host Christmas, with all it’s warmly decorated, folksy Christmas singin’ and carols, good home cookin’ (kerosene pickles aside) and hearty atmosphere of good will to all…

But Ben Weaver the old curmudgeon doesn’t think so. He’s got no holiday spirit in his creaky old body draped in black like the harbinger of doom who Andy refers to as ‘instead of dying’“He’s just going to nasty away.” Bony fingers and hawk like nose Ben Weaver would be a marvelous Ichabod Crane…

Ben Weaver blows his stack when Sam Muggins gets to put his own little Christmas Tree in his cell. “It’s disgraceful that’s what it is… disgraceful a prison is for punishing not for picnicking”  Andy responds- “Now I always thought that a prison was to help wrong doers get back on the path.”  For Ben Weaver tis definitely NOT the season to be jolly.

He does everything he can to disturb the peace so he can be arrested and be included in on a little Peace on Earth at the Mayberry jailhouse…

Andy finally figures out Ben Weaver’s unruly behavior and arrests him so he can be part of the Christmas celebrating! Ben brings his heavy suitcase in, but it’s not filled with his personal items, it’s loaded down with presents for everyone, even toys for the children from his department store. He cleverly pretends that he has no idea how these things have gotten in his suit case, handing out the gifts as if he’s got no use for them himself. Guess he’s got a secret kind spot in his his gnarled looking heart after-all…

Barney gets to play Santa Claus and all is right with the world– Mayberry style….

From all of us here at The Last Drive In… we’re wishing you and yours a very Happy Holiday and Peace on Earth….

 

 

 

 

The Last Drive In: Let’s go to the snack bar!

Joey at the Drive In here… thinking it would be such a nice treat to offer up a brief yet deliciously fun post from the snack bar. What better way to enjoy an intermission between my long winded writing than to just get to the point and tickle your vintage TV taste buds with a little amuse-bouche!

TEN TASTY TELEVISION TRIVIA TID BITS TO TANTALIZE!

1) Lt.Columbo (Peter Falk) loves loves loves chili and he’s very fond of health cookies!

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Eating chili that’s usually served up by Timothy Carey

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A scene from Double Shock co-starring Jeanette Nolan as Mrs Lesh who offers Columbo some health cookies and milk

2) Chief Ironside (Raymond Burr) eats chili and they all like rum crunchy ice cream

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Here’s the Chief eating chili with Mark Sanger (gorgeous Don Mitchell) and the perky Officer Eve Whitfield (Barbara Anderson)

3) The Fugitive’s Richard Kimble (David Janssen) only drinks black coffee… he’s usually on the run

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in Moon Child Richard Kimble (David Janssen) barely gets to drink his cup of joe and crumble a few crackers into his bowl of chili before he’s in trouble…. again

4) The Golden Girls Dorothy Blanche, Rose and Sophia eat cheesecake.

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Betty White, Bea Arthur, Estelle Getty and Rue McClanahan are those Golden Girls eatin’ a cheese cake and talkin’ sex

5) Carroll O’ Connor is the inimitable Archie Bunker who likes either chicken croquettes or a tuna sandwich with an orange on the side and a Twinkie for desert!… in his lunch box.
And lovable Edith (Jean Stapleton) buys him Hhm hhm hhm ( Cling peaches) in heavy syrup when they’re on sale or serves up rice pudding with a drop of milk on top unless he doesn’t ask for it. Dingbat!!!! And of course there’s always beer…

6) Jim Rockford (James Garner) eats Tacos for breakfast… with no apologies!

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7) Andy and Opie enjoy anything Aunt Bee cooks as long as it isn’t those kerosene cucumber pickles. from The Andy Griffith Show

8) Beaver Cleaver will just not eat brussels sprouts but then again I think I’m the only one who loves them…

9) Harry Morgan as Officer Bill Gannon concocts the weirdest food combinations ever. Especially his recipe for BBQ sauce the secret ingredient is…- from Dragnet

10) The sublime chemistry of the Odd Couple’s Oscar Madison (Jack Klugman) eats anything with ketchup on it, and Felix Unger (Tony Randall) doesn’t like pits pits pits in his juice juice juice… uh oh!

“MeTV Remembers the M*A*S*H Finale” Exclusive Broadcast Event
With Series Cast and Creators, Airing on Sunday, May 3
In honor of MeTV’s tribute to M*A*S*H here’s Hawkeye crying a river of liver!

And why say…. as long as we’re on the snacking subject if you’ve got any great additions to add, drop by The Last Drive In’s snack bar and let me know.

Your Everlovin’ Joey (MonsterGirl) saying hope you always enjoy the show!

Life Lessons from Barney Fife -“Mad Worm?”

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BARNEY IS AT IT AGAIN… TEACHING HIMSELF THE ANCIENT ART OF KARATE!

Barney“You know where most of the karate moves come from?”
Andy- “No”
Barney- “From Animals…”{…} “Guess what animal this is, ready- What is it?”
Andy- “I don’t know”
Barney- “Guess”
Andy- “A worm?”
Barney- “Andy” (Sighs)
Andy- “Well it was wiggly”
Barney- “Andy… this is a deadly animal, vicious… a killer!”
Andy- “A mad worm?”

Stay clear of wiggly mad worms now, ya hear! Your EverLovin’ MonsterGirl

More Life Lessons from Barney Fife! “Suppose He’s a bath tub murderer!”

Aunt Bee’s Invisible Beau-

From Season 5, episode 27 Aired March 16th 1965

You don't know much...

Not a bath tub murderer… just your ever lovin’ monstergirl Joey!

Life Lessons From Barney Fife! “…there are forces loose on this earth…”

“Andy… there are forces loose on this earth that you wouldn’t believe… I tell ya it would make your hair stand on end!”

The Andy Griffith Show-Season 5, Episode 14 –

“Three Wishes for Opie” aired on Dec. 21 1964

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George “Goober Lindsey, Don Knotts as the lovable superstitious deputy Barney Fife and Howard McNear as Floyd Lawson in one of my favorite episodes of The Andy Griffith Show Three Wishes For Opie

Your Everlovin’ MonsterGirl sayin’ watch out for those forces loose on this earth!

 

 

 

Life Lessons from Barney Fife: Goober and the Art of Love!

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“Unless I miss my guess you got yourself a kiss coming up about now!”

Here’s to Barney Fife the eternal lover – MonsterGirl

Life Lessons From Barney Fife: The Rumor Season 4 ” It’s not a whim anymore if you put on clean underwear!”

“Well, it’s a whim…Are you gonna question a whim…You question a whim and you take the fun right out of it….”

“It’s not a whim anymore if you put on clean underwear!”- Barney Fife

Original Air Date: 27 April 1964

MonsterGirl (jogabriel)

Barney Fife’s Mother’s Day Ode To Mrs.Mendlebright “Snoop Snoop, Bulb Snatcher!”

The Andy Griffith Show Episode 104: Up in Barney’s Room

ENID MARKEY as MRS MENDLEBRIGHT

Originally Aired on Dec 2, 1963.  Barney is evicted from his room at Mrs. Mendelbright’s boardinghouse after she catches him cooking chili on his hot plate and proceeds to shove the smoking evidence into her mother’s dresser that came by bus all the way from Ft Lauderdale.

She’s also caught him using a 75 Watt bulb and sleeping with the lights on accusing him of being afraid of the dark…

When he goes back to beg for his room, he learns that Mrs. Mendlebright is being preyed on by a con man, and about to sell her home in order to pool assets with this new suspicious boyfriend, Mr. Fields, whom she plans to marry.

Barney doesn’t trust this guy at all, especially after Mrs Mendlebright withdraws “3600 hundred smackers” to give to that “swindler!”

Andy places a call to the next county sheriff’s office and learns that indeed Mr. Fields is a con man with various aliases. Barney drinks his cider which has now turned hard and gets “gassed”

A) A guy moves into town

2) He has no job….and

C) He wants to marry Mrs Bendlemright!

Barney save Mrs. Mendelbright from financial ruin and all is right with the world again!

A salute to motherhood and mother figures: Here is the saga of Barney Fife and his beloved Mrs. Mendlebright!

“I like you Mrs. Mendlebright”, “I like you too…Barney”

Happy Mother’s Day from MonsterGirl

A Day In The Life of Barney Fife: Barney Tags The Governor’s Car

“I’m no good, I’m no good, hey everybody…Barney Fife is no good!”- Barney Fife

MonsterGirl!

Barney Fife Takes a Great Big Axe and Pow Pow Pow!!! To Bad Horror Films!!!!!!!

Barney likes to take a great big axe and give terrible horror flix his Pow Pow Pow!!!!

Movies so bad they’re great!


Today’s “Special Occasion” as Miss Jennifer and Miss Clara Belle would say

EVEN MISS JENNIFER AND MISS CLARA BELLE HAVE TO TURN AWAY IT’S SO BAD!

Shriek of the Mutilated
1974

The always hilarious, terribly acted in particular Tom Grail as Spencer St. Claire in the strangest opening scene it’s too weirdly awesome for words, and Ivan Agar as the weirdest Indian who looks more like a meat packer from Jersey, Laughing Crow (he has no tongue, the natives cut it out because they didn’t believe in the yeti and LC was held captive for 3 days but escaped before the creature tried to eat him?so they cut out his tongue!)

Am exclusive dish on the menu that is “Oriental” great misuse of terminology, anyways, a special meat dish called Gin Sum? which figures into the Indian native culture how? Wait til you find out the ingredients.

An obsessive Academic fop named Ernst Prell played by Alan Brock, who looks like a Nazi who didn’t go to Argentina to hide, instead he teaches Anthropology at the University of idiots U.S.A.

Tawm Ellis as Dr Karl Werner who’s elocution sounds like he’s trying badly, to channel the great Vincent Price.

The day for night scenes that are clearly more day than night. Dr Werner recounted the night he heard the heart beat of the wild beast, the clouds covered the moon, so there was hardly any light to see, although it was obviously 12 noon and I could see every bit of patio furniture on this Island filled with natives? that looked more like Staten Island than Boot Island.

A public domain classical film score that belongs in a 50s travelogue and is so incongruous to the action or lack there of. And best of all, the elusive Yeti creature that looks like a guy in one of those sexual fetish Furry costumes, or a giant killer Lhasa Apso And one of the best lines of all time:

Jennifer Stock as Karen screaming -“it’s his leg, it’s his leg”

It’s  just so god awful it’s that good! Barney says it gets his “Pow, Pow Pow” award….!

Mike Findlay’s Shriek Of The Mutilated 1974 trailer